Time is finite. We can’t create more time, but we can make choices as to how we use the time we have by saying no, scheduling less, cancelling commitments… This is called self-management (the true key to effective time management) – what we do with ourselves during the time we have. Self-management includes:

Maintaining balance is important to all areas of our life. Too much focus in any one area disrupts the others. Balance doesn’t just happen. It is created by the choices we make. We continuously have to self-correct in response to what happens in life to maintain balance. Our well-being is based on our ability to RESTORE balance in the face of continual disruption. To do this we need to recognize what is disruptive and unbalances us and we need to pay attention to what balances us and allows our life to simply flow. By being attentive to our own lives, we begin to see patterns more clearly and then can act on them.

Identifying Your Personal Drainers and Energizers 

 
Barb Small
www.barbsmallcoaching.com
Email: barbsmall@shaw.ca

Two psychologists, Prochaska & DiClementes, determined that people trying to change their behavior go through 5 specific stages of change before they are successful. During each stage you work through a different set of issues and tasks that relate to changing your behavior. Everyone progresses through each of these stages at their own rate. You can’t skip a stage, although you may only be at some stages only briefly. The 5 stages are:

Stage 1: Pre-Contemplation

Stage 2: Contemplation

Stage 3: Preparation

Stage 4: Action

Stage 5: Maintenance

Stage 1: Pre-Contemplation:

• You’re not thinking about making a change because you don’t think you have a problem that needs changing and you are not interested in any kind of help.
• As soon as you consider making a change you have moved onto the contemplation stage

Stage 2: Contemplation:

• You are more aware of the consequences of your unhealthy behavior and open to discussing the possibility of doing something different.
• You acknowledge there is a problem that needs to be addressed, but are still ambivalent about making the change, You weigh the pros and cons of changing, but still doubt that the long-term benefits will outweigh the short-term costs
• Some of us may think and think and think about making a particular change for years, but never move past this stage
• Increasing your self-awareness moves you forward. Some questions to ask yourself:

Why do I want to change?

What is preventing me from changing?

What would help me make this change?

• Identify the first small steps you can take to move yourself forward - this creates momentum.
• Create a list of the personal advantages of making the change and a second list of the disadvantages of remaining where you are – identifying these can also create motivation to move forward.
• Assess your motivation level by rating it on a scale of 1-10, with 1 indicating “no motivation” and 10 being “very motivated”. What would move you up one level (say from a 6 to a 7)? This will help you identify some short-term goals.
• Strategize ahead of time on how to deal with challenging situations if they were to occur. Be proactive. Focus on problem-solving these obstacles, such as: “Who will support me at work if and when I decide to change my eating habits?”

Stage 3: Preparation:

• You have made a commitment to change and in preparation have started investigating options.
• You start gathering whatever you need in order to be successful: surfing the web, seeking help from others (peer coach, personal trainer, nutritionist), calling to find out about community programs and resource, researching how others have succeeded, or taking a course and establishing support people.
• Write down your goal and create an action plan for achieving it. Begin small day-to-day behavior changes. These small steps can help build confidence and develop necessary skills.

Stage 4: Action:

• You are actively doing things to change. Moving forward with the steps in your action plan.
• Your new behavior may still be occurring on a limited and irregular basis because motivation can come and go. With time your new behavior becomes more prominent and the old behavior occurs less and less.
• Reward yourself for any positive steps you take. Reinforcement and support are extremely important in helping maintain positive steps toward change.
• Keeping a food, smoking or activity journal can help to increase your self-awareness.
• It is normal for people to “relapse” or go back to old behaviors when starting to make a change – this does not have to mean you have to give up completely. See your slips as learning opportunities. Ask yourself – “what could I do differently next time if this was to happen again?”
• Reinforce your motivation - How can you keep the most important benefits foremost in your mind? A picture, a photo, a quote, an item.

Stage 5: Maintenance:

• At this stage you maintain your change until it becomes permanent and you don’t need to keep working on it.
• You can still be vulnerable to relapse and need to stay focused on maintaining your new behavior through effective planning and avoiding and resisting temptations.
• You have to continue practicing your new behaviors until they become second nature.

Relapse

• Relapse occurs when you return to your old behavior and abandon the new change.
• It is normal and natural to fall back to a previous stage – most people experience relapse in some form along the way.
• Relapse is often accompanied by feelings of discouragement and a sense of failure. However, the majority of people who are successful at making a change do not follow a straight path to permanent success. Many cycle through the 5 stages several times.
• It is important not to see relapse as a failure. It is important to analyze how the relapse occurred and use it as a learning opportunity and an opportunity to become stronger.
• Identify the triggers that lead to the relapse. Explore how to anticipate future high-risk situations and how you can handle them either once they occur or how to avoid them in the first place.

Barb Small
www.barbsmallcoaching.com
Email: barbsmall@shaw.ca

First, find out what motivates you the most about making this change at this particular point in time. Why do you want to achieve this goal or make this change NOW? Your current motivation may be different than what your motivation has been in the past and your motivation may change over time as you work toward your goal.

Barbara Small, www.barbsmallcoaching.com

• View yourself positively
• Stop comparing yourself to others and what they are doing
• Don't "judge" yourself
• Begin seeing yourself as someone who has the ability to do what you want to do and to do it well
• Recognize the goals or small steps you have already achieved
• Prepare yourself to deal with whatever outcomes or consequences might happen
• Be proactive in identifying strategies to avoid relapse
• Reward yourself when you have achieved each step, no matter how small it may seem at the time.

Barbara Small, www.barbsmallcoaching.com